Monday, January 05, 2004

Retrospective on 2003: A Personal Perspective

2003 was really two years for me, or rather two distinct half years split almost perfectly in the middle. The first half a story of endings, the second half a tale of beginnings. I said goodbye to good friends who life moved to far away corners east and west. My advancing age qualified me for lowered car insurance rates. Which I promptly followed by the totaling of my car (way to go, wait until you don't pay for insurance like a teenager to drive like one). And a new car in the second half of the year.

My "work wife" left the office for a new assistantship. As it turns out, this was a prelude to my own departure. By mid-year, the first phase of my career concluded. Co-workers left for points distant. Farewell parties were had. Interestingly, to me, my departure was sealed 42 days before "mid-year" (June 30); my first day of work at my new job- 42 days past mid-year. Progress in some ways, not so much in others. I have traded meaning for something else, freedom for a springboard. As much as a shock leaving was, I knew (without knowing) it was coming. I could feel a growing degree of disgust souring me.

Early in the year, I contemplated reviving old dreams and goals, not realizing their time had past. As the year progressed and the first season ended, I freed myself from these illusions of an old future. I developed new ideas to answer the nettlesome "What do I want to do when I grow?" Writing, or more precisely editorial work, began to capture the spaces of my imagination. Shortly after the mid-year, this blog was born. Intended as a vehicle to help me rediscover my perspectives and my voice, it has been both a success and failure thus far.

The first half of 2003, it turns out, I was losing me. Shedding the markers I had been holding onto. In the second half, I began to find a new me. Still gun-shy, but dreaming anew in 2004. Here's to further discovery!


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